So long, Farewell, Auf Wiedersehen, Adieu

As LCC Staff/Faculty depart, they are presented with a beautiful embroidered sash -- a traditional Lithuanian gift. Thank you to student-photographer Evaldas Daugintis for the beautiful photo featuring my "turkey timer."

Going into "Farwell Mode"

You don't have to know me well to know that I'm not exactly a musical fan. Please don't try to change my mind-- no matter how many times I attempt to enjoy 'The Sound of Music,' 'Into the Woods,' or *gasp* 'Rent' I just can't find myself humming along. However, God has a sense of humor and has placed a certain nauseating chorus into my brain and I can't seem to get it out. So for those of you who can't get enough of their beloved Rogers and Hammerstein, here you go:

This song has been on cerebral repeat as we prepare to end our time at LCC International University. These past four years of missionary service have been equally challenging and rewarding and it's clear that God has been preparing us for what is next [read more about that here].

You can't, however, begin your next big adventure without concluding the current one well.
Our calendar has been filled recently with the usual farewell parties and gatherings that you would expect from an academic institution. We've been blessed to say our "proper goodbyes" to the colleagues, students, and friends with whom we've shared our lives.

These 'goodbyes' will culminate on Saturday with the Baccalaureate and Commencement ceremonies at LCC. It's more than just an "Auf Wiedersehen" to these students -- it's kind of like our graduation, too. When we arrived on campus four years ago, we joined the ranks of the class of 2016. While we won't be crossing the stage and receiving a diploma -- although that would be awesome -- we too have experienced the growth and wisdom that comes with four years of international life while here in Klaipeda.

These students arrived as freshmen with us and will soon graduate, with many leaving Lithuania behind as they embark on their next journey. We've seen them grow from the oblivious first-year students who always, and I mean ALWAYS, set off the fire alarm in Neumann Hall into wise and experienced leaders ready to tackle the world. We've laughed together, cried together, and built a bond that will long outlast our time on campus. Through both the tough conversations and happy memories, their lives will forever be interwoven with ours. 

A few snapshots from the year. It's hard to believe a few of these guys will be walking across the stage on Saturday!

To the LCC Class of 2016: Thank you for helping shape Josh and me into the missionaries we are today and the people who are not only ready to tackle our next missionary posting in Spain, but also PARENTHOOD!

Baby Baby (i'm taken with the notion, to love you with the sweetest devotion)

Josh constructed a "Sidecar Sleeper" - handtools only.

OK, that's clearly an attempt to switch earworms from my current 'Sound of Music' tune to one of Josh's favorite artists - Amy Grant. You'll have to ask Josh all about his childhood love affair with a certain cassette tape to get the full story on that one.

We're clocking in at 38 weeks and three days, so this little guy could make his appearance any time. The only thing we know for certain is how much we don't know. I think accepting that fact as first-time-parents-to-be is an important step. We have, however, done our research, read the baby and breastfeeding books, and attended birthing class. 

We'll even tour the Klaipeda Birthing Center on Friday with our doctor. (Yes, we're having the baby in Klaipeda. No, we're not worried -- babies are born here every day.).

We're stocked up and ready with all the baby essentials. The hospital bags are packed (to include TP and a tea cup) and the infant car seat has been installed. Thankfully, through the generosity of friends, we've had to spend very little to outfit the nursery for the incoming "Roni" and many of these things will remain in Klaipeda to bless the next baby to arrive on LCC's campus after we've long gone.
If you are looking for ways to support us as we anticipate the arrival of our first child, here are a few suggestions:

• We'll be stateside in a few short months, so consider delaying shipping any baby gifts. This will prevent us from having to pack them back into suitcases and check them when we fly across the Atlantic later this year. We'll have time scheduled in both the Midwest and Arizona so you'll be able to meet our new addition and we can celebrate together in person.

• We'll have considerable resettlement expenses when we are back in the US to fundraise for our next adventure. Consider one of these options: 
• Make a deposit into our personal US Bank Account (JP Morgan Chase). Email us directly for information about this -- alishagarber@gmail.com.
• Consider a gift card. These will surely come in handy when we are back stateside.
• Hold on for a little bit longer. We'll be sharing details about how to make donations through Mennonite Mission Network for our next missionary placement in Spain shortly.

• If you are in the Klaipeda area, consider helping us out with meals / laundry / house-hold chores / sanity breaks after the baby is born. 

More than anything, please support us with prayers. The love will surely be felt across the miles. I must continually remind myself that this is a high-risk pregnancy. With two past miscarriages and my age, we were already in the danger zone. Add to that Gestational Diabetes, anemia and Strep B we know that we're in for an uphill battle in the delivery room. We hope to have a natural birth, but recognize that the baby's health will come first.

Please pray that when the "D-Day" comes, that we have the patience and grace to manage our next big adventure as best as we can -- in God's timing and not in our own.

A very special goodbye gift presented by the Student Life Department on Tuesday. This custom woodcut plaque includes the emblem of our favorite pub in Klaipeda-- Herkus Kantas. Our "home away from home" that includes so many special memories for us like Christmas / birthday / anniversary meals, staff who became like family laughing and crying with us through difficult times, very important tests, visits with friends from the US and Spain, concerts, innumerable delicious beers, and the naming of our son (no spoilers)! This place will be sorely missed when we leave Lithuania in a few short months.

Spain: Seek and You Shall Find

Josh bringing a message of hope to the church in Barcelona with translation aid from Ester, a youth in the church.

For this post to make sense, I suggest you read our LAST ONE first.

In short, the trip to Spain was very good. Incredible, even. But I wasn't going for leisure. I was looking for answers.

When I read the Bible and see these conversational exchanges between people and God, I struggle to relate. It's never worked like that for me. There are very few times I would point at a moment and say, "I know that was God speaking."

However, I went with one prayer -- that it become abundantly clear if Spain is where God most desires for us to serve or not. Nothing in between, just "yes" or "no."

The answer was overwhelming: yes!

Between conversations with church leaders in three very different communities, personal observations, affirmation during the leader's retreat in Madrid, and a consuming sense of inner peace, it's become clear Spain is the right direction for us.

Conversations

Between my Spanish and their English, there was no problem communicating with the various leaders from the three communities I visited -- Barcelona, Vigo and Madrid. I was able to learn about the unique needs of each community and could feel my heart jump into my throat as words like "worship," "youth leadership," and "art" came up over and over again.

It was powerful to see a similar reaction as, after hearing these needs, I revealed Alisha and my giftings.

Perhaps this is how God speaks to us.

Josh, left, and Abel participating in a very local, very fun Catalonian tradition that revolves around eating a spring-onion-like vegetable fresh off the barbecue.

Observations

At each stop, it wasn't difficult to see the potential in each city. Each has ministry connections that make them very important, powerful forces in their communities: aid and housing for low-income families, loving minority groups (Muslims and "gypsies"), and education for kids are just a few examples.

It also wasn't hard to see the factors keeping that potential from coming to fruition. In one community, it might be an overworked pastoral team that has their hands too full with the week-to-week needs to develop other parts of the community that want to grow. In another, it might be competent youth and worship leaders who are approaching burnout.

Regardless of the nature, I observed a real need for help.

Perhaps this is how God speaks to us.

Affirmation

Pastor Davide in the church building in Vigo after receiving a great deal of food for local needy families.

It's one thing to think you hear God's calling. It's another for others to share that they hear it, too.

At the retreat for the Anabaptist church leaders, I had a chance to speak with lots of different people and was also asked to share a bit about our current ministry in Lithuania and also our hopes for the future. I was able to ask many questions and I answered many, too.

By the end of the retreat, five churches had formally extended invitations to serve with them as long-term mission workers.

Perhaps this is how God speaks to us.

Peace

When we announced we would no be returning to LCC International University for a fifth year, our view of the future became very blurry. This, combined with the knowledge we will soon be parents, knocked the forecast completely out of focus.

The moment we allowed ourselves to say, "Spain is our ultimate ministry destination," a significant part of that future came into focus and we were filled with a sense of peace. Not just the peace that comes with making a choice, but the peace that comes from making a blessed decision.

Perhaps this is how God speaks to us.

Next Steps

The Sunday-morning worship service in Barcelona -- full of passion and love

While in Spain, there was one community in particular that seemed to have a "Josh-and-Alisha-shaped hole" in it. The others certainly had need, but they also had people in place who, with the right resources and support, can fill those needs.

We are in the midst of conversations with the community in Barcelona and Mennonite Mission Network (MMN) to ensure we're all on the same page and will continue to establish what a long-term project with them might look like. Nothing is confirmed yet, but we are hopeful this is a good direction both for us and them. We will continue updating as things continue coming into focus. Prayers, in the meantime, would be greatly appreciated.

(CLICK HERE to see photos from Josh's most recent visit to Spain.)

(CLICK HERE to see photos from Josh and Alisha's first visit in October.)

A special thanks to MMN for making this trip possible. About three years ago, we began developing our relationship with MMN and it has been through their support and guidance that we had the means to travel to Spain and connections with so many incredible communities.

Pregnancy Update

Super pregnant, super sassy -- now featuring artistry!

Alisha is super healthy and super happy. Maternity leave has been good for her: she's been diligent in reconnect with her artistic roots and has allowed herself as much rest and relaxation as a pregnant woman can experience.

She's also been feeling the love. You can check out photos from her surprise baby shower HERE and from her surprise birthday celebration HERE.

Due date is still mid May, but we all know the kid will come when he comes.

Actively searching for God's call

As I write this from the back of an unlicensed shuttle hurtling from Klaipėda to Riga at 1:30 a.m., I find myself becoming reacquainted with a sense of adventure that sometimes gets lost in the daily grind.

That's not to say the daily work we find ourselves doing at LCC isn't also a "worthwhile adventure" -- on the contrary -- but the ebb and flow of university life can become a bit predictable -- somewhat like the sea's tide.

However, for the next 10 days, I will be on the road. Destination: Spain.

As you may recall, we had the good fortune of visiting a thriving Anabaptist community in Burgos, Spain, last fall. Alisha and I met many incredible people, had some meaningful conversations, and began developing a sense that this could be where God has been preparing us to serve while at LCC.

This trip, I will be spending some good time with congregations in Barcelona and Vigo before attending a church leaders' retreat in Madrid. From what we were told last trip, Burgos is doing well but other communities are aching for more support. Perhaps we can learn if our giftings match the needs of these communities "on the fringes."

Prayer would be appreciated at this time. I've been asked to preach at the church in Barcelona this Sunday, which is both exciting and a little scary. This will also be the longest I've been away from Alisha in quite a while -- especially now that she is soooo pregnant. In her words, "I'll be a house when you get back!"

I plan on posting about the trip again after I return but, until then, keep making the world a better place.

Leaving LCC

A few of the Spiritual Life student leaders bond during a recent retreat at our flat. Students and their respective countries are, from left, Kamilė (Lithuania), Lukas (Germany), Xhorxhina (Albania) and Katya L. (Russia).

We're making it official -- this is our last semester working at LCC International University.

*insert cries of sadness and gnashing of teeth or cheers of joy and jubilation, depending on how you feel about this*

We've spoken these words out loud to a handful of people now -- mostly family and supervisors -- and they sound strange each time we've said them. But, with each time, the weight that hangs on them comes into focus more and more.

Although we are in year four of a two-year commitment, this is a decision that has always felt much more connected to a sense of God's call than personal choice. As such, this is a decision we've wrestled with each year we've been here. 

• By the end of our second year, it was clear our work at LCC wasn't finished.
• Last year, we knew our efforts were already changing LCC's DNA (in positive ways) and that it would be possible to transition out. However, we've also learned that, in missions, it's always best to be running towards something -- God's plan -- and there wasn't even a remote destination in sight. With staff/faculty members constantly changing at LCC, we've also come to appreciate the gift of good, thoughtful transitions and saw this year as one where we could offer that.
• This year -- as we shared a couple blog posts ago -- it's been hard to know exactly what to write about. The systems we have helped develop are starting to run themselves. This community graciously stretched when we first came and now it has a different shape. At the risk of sounding boastful, we have changed some of LCC's DNA, which is both humbling and encouraging. When we consider whether we are to return or not, the sense we get is, "It's OK to move on."

Again, LCC was never meant to be the place where we would stay until we're too old and senile to work. We came wanting to participate in God's mission as well as develop our calling as God's agents of change.

"What's next?"

The first thing people have asked us is, "What's next?"

Our immediate plans are to have our baby here in Lithuania, spend some time with our relatives, and reconnect with our Phoenix family. But the big picture is still blurry -- these plans are still in God's hands.

"Wait, what?"

While it's clear our time in Lithuania is drawing to a close, we're still looking towards God for guidance for our long-term plan.

Julija and Alisha take a much-needed break after a long week.

Through our time in Lithuania, we've felt affirmed that these past four years haven't been merely an experience intended for just a season of our lives. Rather, this has been a time of preparation for something bigger. 

Perhaps it's appropriate our time serving at a university will end after four years. As the students have been transformed, so have we. Whatever we were before we came to Lithuania, now we are mission workers.

We've been working with our mission agency, Mennonite Mission Network, this past year and there are some exciting ideas we're looking into. I'll even be traveling a bit this semester to visit some communities that have expressed interest in our help (Alisha is too pregnant for that at this point).

For now, we ask for your prayers and support as we continue to seek God's greatest desires for our next actions.

Finishing Well

All of this said, don't think we've checked out of our work here at LCC. God continues to move in this community and we are privileged to be able to be part of that movement. 

Baby Announcement: It's a...

For those who have been patiently awaiting the news on whether or not we are expecting a little boy or a little girl, the wait is over. Before we do the big reveal, however, we'd like to express a few feelings pink vs. blue (not to be confused with Red vs. Blue) onslaught we're anticipating. 

Where are the cars? The soccer balls? The dinosaurs?!

Ever since Josh and I confirmed our third pregnancy, it's been hard to not drift into the baby section of the local shops. The racks and shelves are filled with so many cute onsies, booties, and baby bric-a-brac that is clearly FOR BOYS ONLY or FOR GIRLS ONLY.

Today was a milestone doctor's visit where we were to learn things such as the baby's due date and gender. First off, it's indescribable to explain how it feels making it this far into a pregnancy after our first two losses. We've fully let our minds embrace our future as parents and it is exciting.

That said, the excitement to learn the gender has been partnered with a sense of mild dread: "What if we are gifted with exclusively pink or blue for baby Garber #1?"

Living in Lithuania has exposed us to a strict gender divide you can find in many post-soviet countries. Boys are boys and girls are girls and that's that. Boys have trucks and girls have dolls. Boys wear blue and girls wear pink. 

It seems that there is no in-between and requesting "gender neutral" colors is out of the question. 

Don't get us wrong -- we are extremely appreciative of any gifts and support we have received so far and may continue to receive. But at this point, all we want is a healthy "Roni" with ten fingers, ten toes and a cute little nose -- it doesn't matter which gender box they check on their future FASFA forms.

This is not just liberal ideology, either -- this is who we are. Despite his glorious beard, Josh is not the stereotypical male. He likes creating art, cooking, rejects violence, and doesn't eat meat. And I'm certainly not the picture of femininity! I love watching sports and getting rowdy, a good action movie, and know my away around under the hood of a car.

This short comic about the most recent trend in LEGOs sums things up pretty well.

To be clear, we do not intend to raise our future little one to be gender neutral. However, we want to emphasize the importance of developing character and an independent voice and teach that your value does not come from if you are the best football player or if your doll has the best accessories. 

We're taking some advice from a wise friend and make the following request: If you choose to help out, we would like gifts with gender-neutral colors so that we can use them on future Garbers, regardless of gender.

We're thrifty Mennonite missionaries and this is what we need the most -- not a barrage of princess castles or Tonka Trucks. Kids don't care, regardless of their biological gender and neither do we.

On to Business

Let us proclaim that today's visit was a great one. The baby is coming in at 556 grams (about 1.22 pounds) at 22 weeks and 5 days, placing our estimated due date on May 17, 2016!

The heartbeat is strong and, unlike it's Mama, this wee one is sneaky. This is the second ultrasound where baby "Roni" is using the placenta for a blanket -- making it difficult to see certain...areas. :) 

If you've enjoyed the 2005 animated film "Robots," you may recall this memorable scene (see

image on the right). After the "assembly process" was complete, the robot parents found one extra part in the box...after a swift swing of the hammer, their baby was complete.

In the same spirit, we're excited to announce that baby Garber is a BOY (no hammer required).

Thank you to everyone that has held Josh and me in your prayers as we have struggled with starting a family. We are by no means at the finish line yet, but everything is healthy to this point -- with a little extra anatomy.

To quote our OBGYN, "If it's not a boy, I'll be surprised." 

Our next check-up in February will include blood tests to check for the potential of gestational diabetes and other routine things. 

To continue the spirit of thriftiness, don't be surprised if you get a call like this one sometime mid-May...

'Tis the season of mixed emotions

If you haven't heard our big news yet, check out the following video:

So . . . . . this pause isn't the only thing that's pregnant. You should probably watch this video NOW.
Posted by Joshua Slabaugh Garber on Sunday, November 15, 2015

Helping Julija with her church camp in August. You can see a post from last year's camp here, although this time Alisha was able to join. Julija is the student who adopted us.

If you know anything about our story, you know that our process of trying to grow our family has been one filled with pain, disappointment, and fear. In fact, almost exactly one year ago we were not celebrating -- we were in deep mourning as Alisha and I tried to cope with our second miscarriage.

But this season is much different. Advent has taken on new meaning and the place where Mary's song comes from is filled with new life as we hear those words with fresh ears. If Christmas is about birth, then Advent is about pregnancy.

And holy cow is Alisha pregnant! (For those of you who are interested, we've established Alisha is the "sassy" kind of pregnant lady)

Josh and several of the Ukranian students at the first day of classes parade. Josh secretly hopes he can be as cool as they are.

We know our blog has been somewhat silent and we apologize. In many ways, it's hard to know what to say. Our fourth year at LCC has not been filled with new experiences and new revelations, but we have stayed busy. In many instances, it feels as though we could just re-link to a past blog post and it's content would be just as relevant today as it was when first posted.

However, outside our LCC routines, there's a lot we've wanted to comment on but we've not been able to find the words. I'll do my best here to recap with hopes of revisiting some of these ideas second semester:

• Alisha's pregnancy is something we learned right at the start of this school year, so we've had growing anticipation all semester that we had to keep to ourselves out of fear of the devastation of another loss.
• In the midst of our joy and the anticipation of new life, we've found ourselves in mourning -- late October, we learned that a very close friend and the lead pastor at our church in Phoenix died in a motorcycle accident. I tried to write about that in a blog post but there are no words that can express our sadness. We're still recovering from that along with the Trinity Mennonite Church community.
• The refugee situation here in Europe -- what is there to say? We've tried to do our part in bringing the conversation to LCC's campus but there's not a lot of certainty on how incoming refugees will impact us and the rest of Lithuania.
• We were fortunate to travel a few times this year (click the links to see photos). First to Malta for our 10th wedding anniversary, second to Spain to visit some exciting Anabaptist communities, and finally to Telšiai in Lithuania to play music at the SIELOS festival with the LCC Chapel Band and our group, Sparrows.
• What is our plan for next year? December is usually when LCC wants to know if we intend to return next school year or not. As we are in the fourth year of what was initially a two-year commitment, this has become a process involving great reflection and discernment. We are certainly in the midst of seeking God's will for us.

As you can see from this post, our thoughts are everywhere and anywhere. Our hope is to elaborate better on some of these ideas next semester but, for now, we seek to stay present in this Advent season.

Also, we will be learning our due date and whether we will have a boy or girl after New Years, so check back regularly! We are resolving to keeping this blog updated on a much more regular basis from here on.

If you are reading this, we thank you for your support, encouragement and prayers!

"Cruisin' down the street in my '64..." This is why Josh doesn't get to choose where to park the school van anymore.

Assume the Worst

Mop and bucket: taking care of business since 1837.

This morning there was a knock on the door to our flat and, upon opening it, a woman I've never seen before began berating me for vomiting outside her doorway. Indeed, I looked down (our entryway is, essentially, the same as hers) and there was vomit and bile all through our hallway.

I can say with all honesty it was not my vom. In fact, a friend told us he found a man sleeping in the stairwell -- passed out -- as he left our place late last night and I'm fairly sure that guy was the one who was responsible.

I tried explaining this to the woman but she said, "No, I think it was you or one of your friends who did this to my door."

I reiterated it was not us, that I would be happy to clean it regardless, and that it was very rude for her to make such an accusation.

The whole thing got me thinking: We're really good at assuming the worst in those around us, aren't we? It may be difficult to notice when you are doing it to someone else but you certainly notice when it happens to you.

For instance, LGBT rights are very much in both the national spotlight as well as in that of Mennonite Church USA. And Facebook, being what it is, is ripe with opinions on the issue (usually) expressed in the least constructive ways possible.

Regardless of where you land on the issue, what assumptions are you making about those you disagree with?

From a Christian perspective, I can say I know people on all sides of the issue who care very much about what the Bible says are genuinely seeking to hear God's voice. But rather than love and even pray for those we are at odds with, we quickly cut them down. Those against are all "uneducated, hateful Conservatives" and those for are all "world-pleasing, heretical Liberals."

These assumptions are not constructive and they certainly do not capture the command to love our neighbors.

Instead or writing others off, ask yourself, "Who are the people in my life I naturally assume the worst about?" Get to know those people better. Put a name with the face. Try to understand the circumstances that made them who they are -- maybe you wouldn't be much different if you were in their shoes.

After all, we're all broken children of God in a gritty world trying to figure out what it means to be human. Let's assume at least that much about each other.

We are YOUR ambassadors

Alisha works on a mural at Jeremy and Siwan's house -- perhaps one of Alisha's favorite fundraising activities!

Camping, music, and food with John (and Julie) near Sedona, AZ. It was their second time camping ever!

Time has flown by for us.

The last several weeks have been filled with meals, miles and miles of driving, fantastic conversations, and live music -- all things we encounter in Lithuania but find in surplus in the Valley of the Sun.

Josh going for a post-dinner stroll with roommate Sam.

The longer we serve abroad, the more we realize the degree to which we've been shaped and formed by this place. And the importance of staying connected grows all the more evident. Life, understandably, moves forward whether you are present or not. When we left for Lithuania three years ago, we weren't running away from our lives here -- we were running toward something new as ambassadors of all who have played a role in forming our lives.

So when we see changes -- good and bad -- we recognize almost a parallel life that we gave up when we moved abroad. As Alisha often describes it, "Whole children happen while we are away. Relationships start and, unexpectedly, end. People we expect to see when we come back are gone and there are new people we've never seen before."

To be an effective ambassador, however, you can't just be connected to those who sent you in the past -- you must also be connected to those who presently send you.

Standing against injustice with Jesse.

All this is to say that we cherish those of you we have (and have not) been able to visit this summer. This time we have in the U.S. fundraising is an incredible gift and it fuels us for the work we have ahead of us next year.

We've done our best to connect with as many individuals and families while in the Valley as we could, but we recognize logistics make it impossible for us to see everyone. Bellow is a video we made to give a glimpse of what we, your ambassadors, have been able to do thanks to you all.

(The clips of the orphans were intentionally blurred for their protection)

There are too many people to thank individually who help us out while we're stateside. To be embraced and supported by friends, loved ones, and even total strangers is overwhelming and humbling.